What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
