Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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