I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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