i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
