When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
