I think my vagina is haunted
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize