the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
