i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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