The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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