So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
