Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Duck Duck Cougar?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
we made out on top of his cat.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
