dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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