oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize