I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize