i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I have aggressive nipples.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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