Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
