I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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