I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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