He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize