scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize