But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
