Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
