Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
