Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize