It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Randomize