i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize