Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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