yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
