so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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