my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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