That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He felt like a one man threesome
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
