I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
