Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
