I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insuranceâ€
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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