I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
