i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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