Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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