why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
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