Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
