We're facebook friends in real life
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
