In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
tell me about the fingering
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