Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
