Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
