hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
