I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
