She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
