she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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