You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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