I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
