it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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